talking about love

11:18 am - i'm a minor player in my own life story - tony, twenty four party people

so... for all the rmwc people.
i have been keeping in touch with grace gary, our speaker, and she sent me her speech so i am going to pass it on.

( Translating Vita Abundantior  )

Current Mood: bored

11:24 pm - i know that architecture is life - frank lloyd wright, 1939

i cant get this speech down to ten mins.
really this should not be this hard.
well... maybe like to talk. partically about frank.

i was practiceing in the green room and had the next converstion

me. .... if wright was genius at anything it was his ablity to to see the past, the present and the future at the same time. in other words he was a time lord. (beat) this was never as noticed then in his theories on american suburbs.

one of my favorite firsties. did you just say he was time lord. really that is in your speech. time lords

it really made me giggle on a day i could really deal with some giggling.

Current Mood: content

11:15 am - thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action. - wj cameron

Guess who is on break.
I am on break!

Current Mood: excited

02:43 pm

Does everyone know that Bravo is doing a marathon right now?

Current Mood: excited

02:55 pm - We create ourselves out of the stories we tell about our lives - drew gilpin

i found this in pile of papers the other day and has really made me think about our place in time and history
so i thought i would share it -- its really long

Current Mood: contemplative

08:23 am - nothing useless can be truly beautiful - william morris

i am not ment to be a twenty four hour party person. 

yesterday after (redoing my lj, enjoy the nouveauness) i went to a yard party. after two beers and being eaten alive by bugs we went to the community picnic. the annual community picnic looks like something out of a 1960's television show. i realized that there was a group of us who only have 1 or 2 friends in the county and are trying to expand. i felt really bad when one of the people there told me she only had friends here me and one of the horse guys and this was only the second time i met her. we have desided to have a get together, i am thinking on using one of the girls pools since she is not able to do much since the hourse fell on her.  yeah this should be fun. 

this morning i am going to the brewfest and then a rock consert and i have a hangover from moonshine.

Current Mood: blah

11:07 pm - you've got to bumble forward into the unknown. - frank gehry

i really need to get off this campus. 
i need to get away from these god damn self absored freaks that live with in this colleges walls.
i dont want last semester. 
i dont want to muddle my mind with god damn pills. 
sometimes i feel like oliver in a love story i found something i loved freshman year and since then i have known the entire time that is going to.... oh go watch the god damn movie.

Current Mood: crushed

05:53 pm - it is the loose ends with which men hang themselves -- zelda fitzgarld

i want it to be thanksgiving. 
i want time to be with my self. 
i want time to read and do my work

friday night was ring night. it was really a lot of fun. thank god someone in my group could do math because two history majors and a lit major has a tendency to be scared for calc. the firsties sent us from one of campus to the other thirteen times. and for the first six one of them was following us with all of our ring in a box hand cuffed to his wrist. there was a lot of giggleing at dinner. why the dean of students had to sit with us i dont know. we had mascots of our goup cinderlla barbie and her date mulder, to whom we did some really pervy things with. the firsties sang to us and at the end of the "we love you first years song" they sang we love you macon. it was really cute. there was a party in the room afterward. nothing will ever bet scrubs and coctails. 

yesterday i had a tour at nine am for a guy in the devolpment office. it was a really fun tour. it was me, this alumni from the class of 1960 and her husband and a guy who i looked up recently and is the ceo of wallmart. the tour was going really well until i caught my heel on the hem of my coat and fell down. he left me presents this morning though. i got a biography on zelda fiztgarld and gift card for the bookstore.

Current Mood: sleepy: pills arnt working

07:34 pm - there is nothing left to me but honor, and my life -- francis i

how do you tell the differance between rudeness, protesting, copeing and breaking the honor code that they claim to be defending? 

Current Mood: confused

10:43 pm - life is something to do when you can't get to sleep. - fran lebowitz

the last couple of days have been frantic. i want everything to slow down. 

since the board sent the art to cristies or where every they sent it there has been a werid subculture of protests. i understand competely why they were sold. i have to problem with them not telling me. but my goodness crying in my class is not going to help anyone nor is speaking badly about school to perpestives. i swear some of these people would rather see the school become closed then stop. i went to the candelight thingie for the art. besides being the it girl that the photographer from newsweek seemed to like. i will never wear my dance pants in public ever again. i dont really care if they have a 180 dollar price tag, it was still embarssing since i was stand there with my entire department. 

yesterday my classes were 'cancelled' but i still ended up sitting in dr. american culture office discussing my west wing essay, my love of high end designers and traveling with my grandmom. i going to tryout for the american culture program so i am really hoping that our little talk will help me get into the program. i am pretty sure i can get in, i have his blessing and my advisors. he even asked me what i want to study in the program. my british history class was cancelled but i still spent a hour and a half with her trying to figure out the exam. apperently i cant answer the date qestion with well it happened after the black death. 

today we had our first open house. i had 3 times more guides then families and admissions wanted every guide out. all this ended on my shoulders. their was no way i could have 18 tours all going on at the sametime without all the tours running over eachother. i have no clue how gracie did this last year. i ended up with three or four guides per tour. it was disorgaized to say the least but what elese was i supposed to do.

on the upside of that my fathers goal of having the president know who i am came true. after tours were over and i was sitting having a happy lunch and he stoped by my table and asked me by name how everything was going. it was odd. mostly because he changed and it took me a second to realize who he was. 

all the papers i am juggleing are coming along swimmingly. i am going to have most of them finished in the next few days so i can stick my nose in my notes and get the first a ever in a dr american history class. i am writting papers as a destresser, that cant be normal.

Current Mood: determined

01:23 pm - i am not afraid of death, i just don't want to be there when it happens. -- woody allen

elaine died this morning. She had been my tennis instrutor for a summer and was a fixture in clarke county.  she was incredibly britsh. i some are claiming that is what killed her. she had a colonaspy 2 years ago.they told her that she need to come back, she never did until it was to late. she wore pearls the size of barbra bush's everywhere. she had a parrot and drove a vespa around the county. she loved the better things in life and was always where you never expected to be. i am really going to miss her

grandmom was also taken to the hospital this morning. 

Current Mood: distressed

09:25 am

Elaine died

Current Mood: morning

10:35 pm - "architecture is born, not made - must consistently grow from within to whatever it becomes." wright

today was a werid today on one side everything just seemed to fall into place. i whent up to meet with the woman who runs the maier to talk about museaum studies. and everything i said she just replied. yeah we can do that. "so i want to take your class but i dont want to take art 101" "ok" "i want to have a minor in museaum studies" "well we cant do that because it is not a major but you can be a history major with a emphess" "is that the samething" "yep" "what would i need to do for practicum, since i am not that into art" "well we can send you to poplar forest and let you work with some of americas greatest historians, or we could let you lobby in washington to allow the maier to be a national histoical site, or play with all the orginal blueprints for the school, whatever you want to do" 
it seems odd that everything was that easy.

that is what i was thinking about that when i sat though during uncommon woman and others (i did keep wondering who the others were but whatever) what if everything just keeps falling into place with what i want to be when i grow up what i am i giving up to get it. the woman at the maier keep repeating "you are are very focused". then i keep wondering is my focus going to make me unhappy in the end? am i going to end up in being the one girls who are very sucessful in a career but goes home to a empty home and a empty bed? i am not sure that i want to be alone for the rest of my life. and it is not that i am not noticed by men or that men dont ask me out. i dont know what my brain is trying to comprehend tonight. i am confussed with what i really want in life.

Current Mood: joyously confused

10:57 pm - we will be the very model of a modern network televison

3 mins ago the last thoughtful television show left the american airways.

studio 60 on the sunset strip began with the following opening scene (play close attention to wes)__________________________________________________________________________________________

wes: This isn't gonna be a very good show tonight and I think you show change the channel. You should change the channel right now, or better yet turn off the TV.No, I know it seems like this is supposed to be funny, but tomorrow you're gonna find out it wasn't and I'll have been fired by then. This isn't supposed--this isn't a sketch.

cal: This is for real.

wes: This show used to be cutting edge political and social satire, but it's gotten lobotomized by a candy-ass broadcast network hell-bent on doing nothing that might challenge their audience.We were about to do a sketch you've already seen 500 times. Yes, no one's gonna confuse George Bush with George Plimpton, we get it. We're all being lobotomized by the country's most influential industry which has thrown in the towel on any endeavor that does not include the courting of 12-year-old boys. And not event the smart 12-year-olds, the stupid ones, the idiots, of which there are plenty thanks in no small part to this network. So change the channel, turn off the TV. Do it right now.

jerry: Get him off! Get the camera off of him!

cal: It's his show, I take my instructions from him.

wes: ...and there's always been a struggle between art and commerce, but now I'm telling you art is getting is ass kicked, and it's making us mean, and it's making us bitchy, and it's making us cheap punks and that's not who we are.

jerry: Get him off or you don't have a job tomorrow.

cal: I'm running a live national broadcast, can you threaten me later?

jerry: I'm the network executive in charge here and I'm threatening you now. Get us outa this!

wes: ...We're eating works for money, "Who Wants to Screw My Sister", guys are getting killed in a war that's got theme music and a logo. That remote in your hand is a crack pipe...

jerry: Who else in here knows how to do this?

cal: Don't talk to my staff.

jerry: Get him off!

wes: ...and it's not even good pornography. They're just this side of snuff films, and friends, that's what's next 'cause that's all that's left. And the two things that make them scared gutless are the FCC and every psycho-religious cult that gets positively horny at the very mention of a boycott.

cal: All right--I think we're just gonna go to titles. Stand by VTR.

wes: These are the people they're afraid of, this prissy, feckless, off-the-charts greed-filled whorehouse of a network you're watching. This thoroughly unpatriotic--

cal: Go VTR! Go VTR! Roll titles! Now!


______________________________________________________________________________________________

this was prelude to what ended up happening to the real studio 60. this is what happened the first time that a televison show desided that the chould point out what was wrong with televison. it only holds the 37 on the rateing list and they are pulling it. its 2nd on recordings and 1st on online downloads. give it credit they put it up agenist csi. and then they had to get over the west wing fans and the friends fans who were not going to like josh snoting coke and chanler popping pills. sorry it is not going happen quickly. they pull it and replace it with a over done plotline of every irsh indie film ever. be prepared to have your brain cell bored with lack of language. aaron sorkin at his worst is better then everyother writer on televison on their best day.

all i can do now is hope that the studio 60 hitus is more like boston legals and less like eds

Current Mood: in mourning

04:07 pm - can you spell 'gabbana'? i guess not.....

why can't my body be as happy and as perky as my mind. i am sill excusted and the cramps are still plegueing me but besides that the world is a happy place.

i want to decare here and now that no matter how much i complain that i really do love this school and everyone in it.

i love my classes and i love my professor

the best thing about school is having so many friends who care about me. i know that if anything goes wrong i can go to them. if my classes piss me off or one of the guys that seem to stalking me recently finally breaks my heart i know that i can go to them. i know that if my world falls apart then they will help me put it together.

and they know, or should know, that i will do the same for them.

you cant find friends like that they are far and few between i dont say this enough but in the last few weeks i have really been glad you guys have been there with me though the cramps, the pain, the absolute exustion, the random nakedness, the crapyness that is latin, the bitchiness, the getting rid of the roomate, having dinner with me even when you know that i really want to be watching xfile reruns and everything elese i have gone though.

thank you. i dont know what i would have done with out you.

Current Mood: thankful

04:19 pm - the morning sky is red and falling down

so the high queen of drama finally moved all her stuff out. well most of it, since she did not leave a note i'm thowing out the rest of the stuff she left. staring with the mid 70's porn film drape that was hanging on the door. so glad to have that thing gone. and then the gels which made us look like we were going through the trash to decorate.

its all gone, now i can live in a room that looks as if someone who has passed the point of middle school crushes on mcdreamy decorated.

Current Mood: ecstatic

09:06 pm - mr e edward gray

for the first time in a what seems like a very long time i feel well. exusted but well. the magical doctor's even more magical nurse informed me that even though it burst i am still going to have to wait a few more months till my body aborsrbs it.

sounds fun.... or not

here is the best news of the week, i have started the process of redecorating and i think that everyone knows how my heart just leaps with joy someone says the word deocrate. its like saying junk hole shopping and i love junk holes. i am starting to talk like vala. i need to stop watching stargate.

daniel......

back to the decorating and away from that pervy thought process. i get to mirror walls. and play with colour scemes using blocks of single color posters. which if you really need to know have been preplaned completely. and that block of warm colors is being counteracted with cool colors and i have a excuse to ebay buy shit on ebay.

pillows lots of pillows and sheets (i just have a thing about sheets)

spader.......

that was a longer break. back to the decorating. by the way i have coffee. not alot of coffee but enough to make me really hyper. i just going back to the deocrating.

i want my pillows.

Current Mood: energetic

02:42 pm - insecurity is a horid excuse for self-indugence

when i left for college one of the family friends gave me the same speech he gives to every college freshman. i was a simple request: go to class. i have problems skipping i whent to my fifth grade class the morning after my grandfather died (we had a sub). I whent to band camp when AE died and i still took my knowlege and reality test after being told grandpop was no longer with us.

you would think that my mind would at some point figure that i was going to to go to class if i was dieing and would contemsate for that desion but atlast no. yet another reason the mind body problem annoys me.

this morning i whent to american womans history, european history, and american lit in so much pain that is was all i could do not to scream and cry. i am in as much pain as i was when this started. yesterday it was just spouts of pain and now i am back to haveing pain all the time.

the ultram is making me just high enough not to care. it is not taking away the pain just making me not care

i just want to be well.

on the upside all of the former roomates stuff is in the closet and all her "things" are off the walls. which is one thing that is going right.

Current Mood: frustrated

08:08 pm

Haec credam a
deo pio?
A deo iusto? A deo scito?
Cruciatus in crucem! Tuus in terra servus nuntius fui officium perfeci.
Cruciatus in crucem. Eas in crucem!

Current Mood: indescribable

10:35 pm

where did my copy of 38 latin stories go?

yeah the bitchiness has started to kick in. im sorry. i am starting to really dislike people. little things are pissing me off more then the should, like things dont match and giggleing. if looks could kill then half of campus would be dead.

where the fuck did that book go, did it go back to rome?

upside of the last couples days the cramps have been subsideing. i have found the secret 2 advil every 6 hours and then you add some ultram (which has a buildup in my system and was making sick, so i am trying to avoid it) and if that does not work i wait for a little bit and take the magic bextra. god i love drugs.

its not that big a fucking book!

had dinner with the first wives club on friday, everyone at the resterant had a baby. it made my uterus lonely. i startig to think i am the only woman left who want a baby.

maybe the book will translate its self

the nerd princess, the nerd duchess and i got stuck in the car yesterday. we drew stargate syobolms all over the windows it was nerdy. it made me happy.

cant find the fucking book!!!


ohhhhhhhhh found the book, it was in my closet. dont know why.

going to take some drugs and translate some latin.

Current Mood: accomplished